Home > American Idol, Recaps, Television > American Idol Finale Recap – Fantasia Returns + Jennifer Freaking Holiday

American Idol Finale Recap – Fantasia Returns + Jennifer Freaking Holiday

The show opens with the #’s 13, 11-3 singing Bruno Mars’ Runaway Baby. Makes me long for the Just Joshua version.

Next up, Phillip Phillips & John Fogerty singing “Have You Ever Seen The Rain,” followed by “Bad Moon Rising”. Here’s hoping Phillip writes as good songs as he has had the honor to perform on Idol.

My man JOSHUA is up next with “Take Me To the Pilot” joined by FANTASIA!!! We have our Mantasia-Fantasia duet!!!! And she looks GOOOOOOOOOOD. Way to rock the long hair, ‘Tasia. And way to show ’em Joshua that you should have been the winner tonight.

The Ladies of the top 12 take on a Chaka Khan medley, starting with Ain’t Nobody, Through the Fire, and I’m Every Woman. I love Erika with the blonde hair again and really regret that she didn’t make it further. And just two words out of Skylar’s mouth make me feel exactly the same way about her. Even Shannon Magrane redeemed herself. And out comes miss Chaka herself looking great. So happy to see her on this stage. Makes me remember the official Grammy after-party some years back when she was the entertainment and no one was listening. ‘Twas an indignity.

Jessica & Phillip present their brothers with a new Ford car?!?!? Followed by Ryan presenting Jessica & Phillip with their own cars.

Rihanna performs her new single, “Where Have You Been”. I do like me some Rhianna.

Skylar performs next with Reba McIntyre. What a great pairing. Skylar gets to perform with her idol. She can’t be disappointed at all. I’m sure a huge recording contract is forthcoming if it hasn’t been awarded already.

Jessica reprises her version of Whitney’s “I Will Always Love You”, showing without a doubt that she has earned the crown. Were she only not pitted against The Inevitable.

Oh boy. Here come the boys with a Neil Diamond medley. Makes me realize that Colton did not leave too early, that Heejun lasted way too long, and that we never need see Jeremy Rosado again. I love that they made Colton introduce the ol’ cheezeball, Neil Diamond. He is clearly horrified underneath the perma-smile.

JLo performs. She is pre-recorded and auto-tuned. Come on, JLo. Aren’t you even moderately embarrassed?

Ryan invites couple Ace Young and Diana DeGarmo on stage! They have moved in together and now have the same hair. WHAT?!?!?!? He proposes to her and she accepts! When did they start dating? When did this show become The Bachelor? And when did Diana develop a southern accent? Totally bizarre.

Hollie sings “You’ll Never Walk Alone” and is joined by Jordin Sparks, who looks GOOD. Boy, this is really old home night on Idol. Boy, that song is terrible.

Idol honors Robin Gibb with a medley from the boys. Jeremy – stop fouling up the harmonies!

HOLY SHIZZZ. Jennifer HOLIDAY joins Jessica to perform “And I Am Telling You”. Jennifer Holiday is crazy good and just crazy as always, and Jessica proves without even the littlest shadow of a doubt that she deserves to win this thing. I mean she MORE than held her own with Jennifer Freakin Holiday.

Aerosmith performs and Steven Tyler proves why he is the most relevant of the Idol judges. He actually sings!

Jessica and Phillip finally duet – on “Love Lift Us Up Where We Belong”. Perfect song choice for them. And by the way they fake-embraced, it is crystal clear that these two have no love lost between them.

And in the least suspenseful and most unfair moment of the season, The Inevitable – Phillip Phillips – is crowned the 11th winner of American Idol. He looks about as excited as he has every week – wait – FINALLY. He breaks down and just loses it in the middle of singing surely the biggest Idol coronation song since “A Moment Like This”. It is most definitely the best coronation song ever. And he rushes into the arms of his family.

Thank you, Phillip, for redeeming yourself and the season with that display of emotion. The inevitability would have been much more tolerable had I been able to believe that PhilPhil cared at all. Now that I know he does, I feel better about his having robbed us of a Jessica-Joshua finale. I will allow my initial excitement about PhilPhil to return. No question he has a magical quality about him.

And that wraps the best season of American Idol in years, if not ever. Thank you for joining me on The Inevitable’s march toward the crown. See you in ’13.

Wertheim out.

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